I Want to Be…

I want to be great.
A great lover of great women.
Proud. Prowess. Excess.
A spectacular dongle
Hangs to my side.
A battleaxe to make the feeble tremble.

I want to be strong.
Big man arms.
Broadside Chesty Bond
Big throttle handshake
Pinch those biceps.
Ooohh… They’ll say…

I want to be smart.
Whip sharp. Smarty pants sharp.
Sharp as a Faber-Castell, fresh cut.
Quick as the crack of whippet’s tale
Smarter than ol’ King Kong
Meaner than a junkyard dog.

I want to be rich.
Richer than Richie Rich.
Rich and silly with it.
Tip the waitress an easy hundred.
Special club lounge VIP, pointy-end rich.
Yes Mr Sir. Let me take your lovely coat.
Toss the keys to the valet with a wink.

I want to be seen.
Seen on the TV the old way.
Not YouTube. Not Instagrim
Not Snappy Chatty, What’s Appy.
Big screen mean seen.
Oh… There he goes…
Front of the queue for him.
In you go sir…

I want to be serene.
Know things. Wise things. All things
Oh he’s so peaceful!
Like he sees the world just as it is.
Mind like water
Like Teriyaki Hydroponi

I want to be honoured
Honour rolled.
Knighted and knotted
MBE’d, QBE’d, FTE, MCSE
Citizen of the year
Mr Universal

I want to be free
Doubtless. Stateless. Hapless.
Senseless.
Fearless.
Weightless.
Ouchless.
A patch of air.
A piece of sky.
A tiny thing.